There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one’s seen before. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road. If it …Read More »
Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. Keep skunks and bankers at a distance. Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. Words that soak into your ears are whispered… not yelled. Meanness don’t jes’ happen …Read More »
Editor’s Note: I have two small dogs that love to see our UPS driver, Thad, whenever he comes down the street, because they always get a dog biscuit if he stops by. This story is taken directly from the Facebook pages of UPS Dogs UPS drivers deliver packages all day …Read More »
Story written by a 6-year-old Someone walked by some cute animals. They were so excited! Someone adopted a puppy. It was a golden retriever puppy. Someone else wanted a puppy to love. They got a toy poodle puppy. They were really excited! They loved puppies. They said, “Aww, this is …Read More »
A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked …Read More »
Dead Duck A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away." The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet.. "How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."Read More »
-- By a 6-year-old
Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.
I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.
As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them.'
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.'
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
Close your eyes and go back... Before the Internet, or the MAC...
Before semi automatics and crack...
Way back. I'm talkin' 'bout...
Hide and seek at dusk. Sittin' on the porch, The Good Humor Man, and Red Light, Green Light.
Chocolate milk, Lunch tickets, Penny candy in a brown paper bag.
Playin' Pinball at the corner store. Hopscotch, butterscotch, doubledutch, Jacks, kickball, dodgeball, Mother May I? Red Rover and Roly Poly.